Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Ways to know you've been single for WAY too long

Well you guys are in for a treat because I’ve decided to go with my original plans for today’s blog thanks mainly to my dog Pepsi. I was pretty enraged thanks to my jackass step-father, but after giving my dog a nice big comforting hug my anger seemed to go away and I was able to put back my ugly side, but that’s a story for another day. Today’s blog is about being a single guy for WAY too long and the signs to let you know that you fall in to this category. By the way this is in many ways a jab at myself so don’t think I’m talking about anyone else.

The one thing that will happen is your one to ten scale goes through some changes. Now don’t get me wrong this can easily be a good thing because if you don’t alter it you will never lose your status of being single. Take for example myself: before it used to be a complete turn off if a girl smoked however that changed gradually and now it’s not an issue with me.

Another way to tell is when you see a woman from far away, like say going into a gas station while you are at a gas pump, and thinking to yourself that she looks hot. Then when you go into the gas station and get a close up look at her and realize she isn’t that great looking and continue on your way then after she passes you again you say to yourself she isn’t that bad looking. When that happens it’s a sure sign that you’ve been single for WAY too long.

If most of the women you see while walking around the school are eights or higher, it’s a good chance that you have been single for WAY too long. Heck if you go in to your first day of class and hope that there are some cute women in your class it’s a good chance that you have been single for WAY too long.

Now you may be asking yourself “What makes Spence such an authority on being single for WAY too long?” Well that’s an easy question. You see I’m 30 years old and in my entire life I’ve been in .5 relationships. Now I’m sure you are wondering “How can someone be in .5 relationships?” Wow I’m glad you asked. You see back in high school, I think it was my sophomore year in fact, I had a friend who was having a problem getting rid of his ex-girlfriend who was being a little clingy in his mind so I made the suggestion of setting me up with her. We went to lunch after that and when I came back my friends told me that I was officially going out with her. So after eating lunch I went over to talk to her for a little bit to get to know her and after lunch we went our separate ways. The next morning my friend gives me a break-up note from her. Now considering this relationship lasted oh say only a few hours not even twenty-four hours at that, I personally don’t count it. On the other hand she does count it, so since only half of us count it, it’s only half of a relationship.

Now keep some things in mind first of all every single one of these could go for women as well. Secondly please I beg of you do not take this as an invite to try to fix me up with anyone. Where I’m at right now in my life I’m not looking for a woman, if one should happen across my path then I would not turn a way but please do not put one in my path. Finally this was intended to be a light hearted blog as opposed to yesterday’s blog this was all meant to be a joke.

Now for what really does seem to be a fan favorite part of my blog the Random Bachelor Dare Card of the Day.

Today’s card is: “Offer to buy a drink for the first girl who delivers her thong to you”

Wow I told you there was some interesting one’s in that deck. That one could be funny to watch and who knows maybe even could lead to something more.

728 words

Monday, April 20, 2009

Ignorance and some other random stuff

Ok well this should be a real interesting blog because I will be covering many topics it was only going to be one but someone just had to ask a couple of questions. So for my first portion it comes with a warning to any young ones. You see some young people may get a tad upset about some of the things I may say but I can pretty much guarantee that most if not all adults will agree with me on some of these subjects however some kids who read this may agree but that’s just due to good parenting. Anyhow if you feel that you may be offended by my topic then just scroll down a few paragraphs where I will be talking about the other subjects, movies and teenage love.

So for those of you still with me I’m going to be talking about ignorance. Now when I say that I’m not talking intelligence I’m talking attitudes. I’ve been throwing this topic around in my head for a while now but then it was called something else. After yesterday and a little bit this morning it evolved. Yesterday my friends and I were cleaning up the park and had started to setup in the only shelter in the park. We had our banner proudly hung displaying our efforts to keep the park clean. We were putting our blood, sweat, and tears (or at least blood and sweat not sure about the tears part) in to cleaning it when a group of people came and without asking anyone in our group proceeded to take down our banner. When approached about it they proceeded to get ignorant about it saying that they had a reservation which would have been fine if they stopped there however from what I heard they proceeded to make threats of bodily injury to some of our members. Personally I think that may have been due to the fact of looking at those members and being frightened of them for various reasons. Well we finally settled things with them peacefully mainly because we were the better (read not ignorant) people. Well things were ok until in my mind the rest of the ignorant young people came. They proceeded to blast their stereos and their rap music walking around with their pants below their asses showing the world their underwear.

Well now here’s the part where I start to sound old. First off they call what they listen to music? That is not music. I have nothing against rap but most of the stuff they play nowadays is far from rap. When I was growing up we had the good stuff NWA, Dr. Dre, Snoop Dogg, LL Cool J, and even Run DMC. Most of the things they rapped about were smoking or sipping on Gin and Juice (laid back with my mind on my money and my money on my mind {oops sorry there I just couldn’t resist}) and the best part was they had a little something called a melody. Nowadays, from what I can understand, they talk about being thugs and pimps doing nothing but bragging about what they own. Which leads me to the other thing about today’s generation. Why the hell do they think we want to see their underwear? After all there is a reason it is called underwear that’s because you are supposed to wear it UNDER your pants. Now I don’t know if this is true or not but I heard somewhere that this was a fad that got started in jail, you see apparently in jail when you wear your pants like it meant you belonged to somebody, and when some rapper got out of jail they started wearing their pants like that and it caught on. Now don’t get me wrong I have no problems with that but I’m not so sure that they would be happy about it.

This leads me to another sign of ignorance now it wasn’t anything that happened yesterday but it still bugs me and that is prejudice. Now we all know that prejudice is not something that is limited to skin color. There are people out there that will condemn you for many reasons all due to one thing you are different than them or even different than the norm. One prime example of this is when people hear that we are pagans they immediately assume many things about us that are false. “Ooo you’re pagan you must be a devil worshiper.” Or even “You’re a witch huh? Well don’t go turning me into a frog or anything”. Of course there is my favorite “You are a witch? Well may God Bless you and prevent you from going to hell.” People do the world a favor and read and learn about us before making assumptions and discriminating us from doing things because of our religion.
Anyhow, now that the serious part is out kids you can start reading again. So the first question was do you think your teen would know if they were in love? Well I don’t have any kids but I do think that it’s possible for kids at a young age to find their true love. This is mainly due to the fact that I am a romantic person and sometimes even have a sort of radar for that kind of stuff. Too bad it doesn’t work for me but when do any cosmic things work for one self. Any how the second question asked was what movie do you hold above all other as your favorite? Well for me this was a simple choice, The Princess Bride. This movie has everything in it sword fights, pirates, comedy, action, and there was one more thing that made it great um let me think oh yeah true love.

Now for everybody’s favorite part the Random Bachelor Dare Card of the Day. Today’s card is: “Tell a gal a dirty joke. If she doesn’t laugh, keep telling dirty jokes till she does.”

Wow yet another lame one. I promise that these can and will get better but at least I’m weeding out the lame ones first.

Wow sorry people I guess I got a little too carried away with this 1028 words.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

How I got into Paganism

So apparently there was another challenge that put out there that I skipped over. Sorry my mistake. Anyhow this challenge was how you first became a pagan. Well I sorta had a lot of help from many people namely my younger sister. She was a part of the Phoenix Council long before I was. She would speak about paganism quite a bit and at the time I was just sort of not really caring about religion at all. Then one day she invited me over to play some Dungeons & Dragons. I figured what the hell I’ve always wanted to play so why not. Well that night I met four wonderful people (and one not so great but I won’t delve into that) who would change my life forever and become some of my closest friends. Anyhow I would listen to them as they talked about paganism and its various aspects.

Well then my sister told us that she was going to be leading a ritual and asked us to come and watch. Well I figured why not. This ritual she did was the 2007 Beltaine ritual. I sat outside and watched and started to think this is pretty cool. After that I stuck around to see some more rituals. I went to a Samhain ritual and barely met another future friend even though I barley remembered him being there however there was pictures so we at the very least were both there. After that I was invited to go to a Yule celebration, and I got to watch and enjoy that. However, even though I did nothing other than stick close to the only person I knew there, my name was put into some controversy and I wasn’t even a part of any groups which was funny. This whole time every so often my friend was dropping hints trying to get me to join the Phoenix Council. After that it wasn’t long before I made the decision to join.

After I joined I still watched from the outside trying to learn what I could for fear of looking bad and messing up, but when it came time for the 2008 Ostara ritual/ toga party send off for my sister who was leaving for South Korea I participated in my first circle. Then came Beltaine 2008 where not only did I participate but I for the first time I called a quarter.

As far as any myths or anything like that the only thing I didn’t know was the difference between a witch and a warlock. However I now know that a warlock is someone that is pretty much a cast out. A witch is a magick user. In a nutshell at least.

Now for everyone’s favorite part and mine the random Bachelor Dare Card. Today’s card is: “Go up to a cutie and say in your smoothest voice, ’I just love you {insert wrong color eyes here} eyes!’ When she corrects you, wink and say, ’Sorry I’m colorblind.’”

Ok seriously now that seems pretty lame don’t get me wrong I’d love to get that card but as you’ll see there are some dares that are pretty out there.

This has been another bunch of pure randomness produced by me Spence.

529 words.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Family

Ok so yesterday I answered the challenge of steelwitch and put a new theme challenge out for everyone. So since I made the challenge I’d say it’s pretty fair that I follow it. The theme I put out there was family and what does it mean to you. So let me just access the save file I made in my brain last night and explain what family means to me.

First of all to me family does not only include the people you are related to. Family really stands for those people that are closest to you. The people whom if they were to suddenly leave your life completely, forever, for whatever reasons it would leave a huge gaping hole in your heart. Personally I have many people in my life right now that would fall under that category. So I will go through them, trying to leave out names where I can.

Let me first start with the people I’m related to. First one that pops in my head is my mother. My mother is one of the best people you will ever know. I can honestly say that I’ve always had the cool mom, the mom that everyone loves. I think the best quality of my mom is that she is unjudging, meaning that she don’t care if you are white, black, green, Pagan, Christian, a follower of the big blue shoe, gay, straight, or whatever she will not judge you until she gets to know you on the inside; which I’m proud to say I think I’ve picked that quality up from her. Then we have my Grandma she is the world to me. She will do anything she can to help out her children and grandchildren. My father is another one I’m kinda close to and would feel pain if something happened to him, however I don’t know him as well as I would like to, but look forward to his visits. I also have two wonderful sisters who mean the world to me. We have my youngest sister, who well the best way to describe her is she is extremely headstrong. I’m hoping to get her going to school and possibly not being as lazy as she has been lately. Then we have my younger/ middle sister (I’m the oldest of three) who actually plays double duty because not only is she my sister but she is also my coven mate.

Speaking of my fellow coven mates I think I’ll start on the people I consider family that are not related to me. I’ll start off with someone who I would best describe as a big sister. She is a great and caring person and has three wonderful children that I also feel close to. Then we have the tech guy he is a brother to me and I look forward to learning many things both from him and beside him. The next one is someone I also consider a sister she has been there for me many times emotionally when I’ve needed her and is a true friend. I can’t forget her husband he is another like all the rest that I can turn to for guidance in many things and is also a fellow techie. Someone else whom I consider a good friend and brother would be my friend and fellow geek whom I’m learning many things from including Dreamweaver. Finally but far from least would be my best friend whom unfortunately lives in Ohio. I miss him very much and enjoyed tiny bit of time with him when I visited him for a few days this summer. He is truly a great friend and brother. We have been through many things over the years including his many bands that I had the pleasure of roadieing for. I just hope that someday soon he and his family can come down here to visit and meet all of my wonderful friends I have made in Florida.

Well that is what family is to me. The funniest thing is my inspiration for this theme is the latest episode of Heroes. Anyhow now for the fun part my Random Bachelor Dare Card of the Day.

Today’s random card is: “Walk up to a chick drinking a beer and say, ’I bet I can chug my beer faster than you’”
Wow that one was kinda lame oh well hopefully tomorrow I’ll have a better one.

Well this has been another group of random thoughts from me, Spence

Word count 738. Eat that people almost double the required amount HaHaHa. lol

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Apollo

I was reading the blog of one of my competitors today and he came up with a great idea and challenged each of us to tell about our God and or Goddess. Well I have no problem with that. I’ll just have to make a save file in my brain for the topic I planned on doing today and suggest it for the next theme, but I’ll throw that out there later in the blog. Now then since I’m still a little new in my following I don’t know too much about my god but I’ll do what I can.

Apollo is the Greek God of the Sun; truth and prophecy; archery; medicine and healing; music, poetry, and the arts, animal welfare, and so on. He is the son of Zeus (boy did HE get around) and Leto, and the twin brother of Artemis (who it seems is not too fond of men). One of his messengers, as I have recently found out, is the hawk. Yeah nothing like driving down your street and looking up to see a hawk staring down at you from the telephone wire he’s sitting on or standing around outside cleaning your BBQ grill and not only seeing a hawk fly overhead but hearing it call out to me. This is actually how I kinda sorta figured out that I should be worshiping Apollo. Although after I thought about it, it made sense. I love music, the arts, and pretty much all entertainment; I love animals; and I must admit I’m pretty fond of the sun. Some other animals that are sacred to Apollo are wolves, dolphins, swans, cicadas, ravens, crows, snakes, and mice.

Now for a story about him, this is difficult since there are so many good ones. Let’s see here, well this story involves Hermes and Zeus as well but it is pretty good and deals with the inventing of one of Apollo’s most famous symbols, the lyre.
Hermes was born on Mount Cyllene in Arcadia. The story is told in the Homeric Hymn to Hermes. His mother, Maia, had been secretly impregnated by Zeus. Maia wrapped the infant in blankets but Hermes escaped while she was asleep. Hermes ran to Thessaly, where Apollo was grazing his cattle. The infant Hermes stole a number of his cows and took them to a cave in the woods near Pylos, covering their tracks. In the cave, he found a tortoise and killed it, then removed the insides. He used one of the cow's intestines and the tortoise shell and made the first lyre. Apollo complained to Maia that her son had stolen his cattle, but Hermes had already replaced himself in the blankets she had wrapped him in, so Maia refused to believe Apollo's claim. Zeus intervened and, claiming to have seen the events, sided with Apollo. Hermes then began to play music on the lyre he had invented. Apollo, a god of music, fell in love with the instrument and offered to allow exchange of the cattle for the lyre. Hence, Apollo became a master of the lyre.

Not a bad story I’m sure I could find more but that’ll due for now. So now then since, as far as I know, I’m the first to answer this theme challenge I guess I’ll choose the next theme. Since a lot of us are as close as a family and many of us are close to our own blood-related families my theme is family and what does it mean to you.

Now for the fun part of the blog the random bachelor dare card, if you don’t know what I’m talking about read my previous blog.

Tonight’s random card is (drum roll) … “Convince the oldest guy in the bar to do a Liquid Viagra (Red Bull and Jägermeister).” Wow that’s an interesting one, good luck in trying to figure out the oldest guy in the bar and convincing him to do a shot by that name.

This has been another set of random thoughts from me Spence.

Oh and steelwitch 674 words here.